Archive - Food Allergy Req's

(Untold) Requirements for Being a Parent of a Child with Food Allergies

There is a general baseline of worry that any parent carries for their child - skinned knees, hurt feelings, unfulfilled
dreams. But when parenting a child with severe food allergies, this baseline of worry is constantly heightened.
Dangerous situations lurk everywhere - situations that are seemingly benign to others.

Take for example birthday parties, or any other holiday heavily associated with food. This is a landmine involving lots
of "forbidden" foods presented in an irresistible manner. The pressure for both parents and child is huge, as can be the
resulting feeling of exclusion to manage safety for your child.

Another seemingly benign situation that can turn problematic are the innocent kisses or hand-holding by relatives who
did not wash offending foods from their lips or hands before smothering your child. There's also the trace amounts of
food protein that remains on shared toys, picnic tables, airplane seats, etc. that can cause flairs without much
warning. And forget the good old "take me out to the ballgame" surrounded by peanuts-and crackerjack-causing
anaphylaxis.

Anticipating, preparing for, and protecting from these potentially life-threatening situations requires more than just
common knowledge. Parents of children with severe food allergies are required to possess more than just the basic
parenting skills. They must also acquire specialties in the following:

Medicine - understanding, recognizing, and treating food and/or environmental allergies, eczema, and frequently also
sinus infections, ear infections, and asthma flairs. Treatment rounds often parallel the schedule of a medical intern -
shifts that last days at a time with little or no sleep.

Private investigation - researching and decoding ingredients in food, lotions, shampoos, toothpaste, and art
supplies, etc.; investigating processing practices of companies that might possibly present cross-contamination
threats; anticipating and preparing for hidden dangers lurking on surfaces undetected by the naked eye.

Culinary Arts - adapting "normal" kid recipes to safe, yet still tasty versions, by eliminating several major food groups
like milk, egg, wheat, soy and/or peanut. (The super power to effortlessly cook treats from scratch when notified at
the last minute helps in this specialty too).

Nutrition - learning nutritional requirements for children as they age. Due to the need to eliminate often multiple food
groups, knowledge of how to substitute said nutritional requirements in alternate ways. (A bit of magical powers also
helps in this specialty to ensure your child will actually consume the nutritional substitute.)

Social Work - helping your child to cope with their fear of birthday parties; helping yourself to cope with your fears
when your child attends birthday parties; counseling extended family members on how to administer an epipen and
why it is essential to carry such medications when your child is in their sole care and food is involved; deflecting the
attitudes from others dismissing you as a "hyper parent;" supporting the development of positive self-esteem and
self-sufficiency in your child in spite of their medical conditions; empowering your child to advocate for themselves as
they mature by instilling the knowledge of their forbidden foods, awareness of how to recognize and treat a reaction,
responsibility to be prepared in different situations, and courage to educate friends and important others.

Legal - needing to explain the "fatal" potential to parents for playdates, teachers and school administrators, and
other caregivers; insisting safe accommodations be fulfilled; outlining allergy action plans to implement.

Ultimately, none of us parents of children with severe food allergies chose to become the CEOs of our households
(Chief Eating Onlookers). Nor did we have the opportunity to prepare in advance for the diverse specialties required to
successfully navigate this path. Upon first diagnosis, or first reaction, we received a crash course of mostly
self-instructed, on-the-job-training. We were left to rely upon books, food allergy organizations, and the wisdom of
other parents also forging the same battle.

We don't have diplomas or certificates to hang on our wall that acknowledge our special skills. Nor do we have money
to gain from this knowledge and practice. (Especially when you consider the higher cost of "safe" food!) Perhaps our
profit then will come in the future….the day when awareness of food allergies becomes so influential that it is able to
harness the resources that ultimately leads to a cure.