Blog - A World Divided

A World Divided

I've recently discovered, with much dismay, that the world of divisions that existed in high school did not cease to
exist upon graduation.

Somehow the cheerleaders, student council reps, athletes, honor society members, and those with popularity and
wealth morph into Moms (and Dads). And once their kids are old enough to be mobile and "socialize," the divisions that
existed as teenagers emerge strongly again.

It seems as though the two groups that elicit the most emotional responses are the divisions between the working
moms and the stay-at-home moms. I've witnessed many a passionate "conversation" about the importance of both
sides of that sword. And while these two sides can and do associate, some underlying prejudice always seems to
resonate.

Even among these main party lines, moms are further divided into other extremes and hybrids thereof. For example,
there are the stay-at-home moms who are exclusive breastfeeding, organic farming and cook-from-scratch,
composting and eco-friendly cleaning, no TV-watching, home-schooling Moms. And there are the stay-at-home moms
who are bottle-feeding, chicken nuggeting, house cleaning employing, Disney channeling, park district program
participating, and okay with public schooling Moms. The rise of a passionate "conversation" about any of those
convictions could be just as separating. Now take into consideration the hybrids of these extremes, the divisions carry
on until, like a number continually divided, little remains.

Divisions are not only based upon employment or lack thereof, but also upon other high-school-like factors, such as
where you live and what you have. In my experience, the neighborhood in which you live has a big impact on who will
talk to you when you pick up your child at school. Neighborhood cliques are deeply rooted and frequently already
complete. "Outsiders" are just often invisible or unnecessary. Beyond your neighborhood, the stuff others see is once
again essential. The type of stroller you push, type of diaper bag you carry, brand of clothing you AND your kids wear,
all come back into play at play groups.

While some group divisions might exist due to employment, housing and accessories, others might arise due to your
own previous affiliations. The group to which you once belonged in high school may impact your suitability for the
clique of adults-with-kids currently. For example, high school cheerleaders have an edge at the T-ball and soccer
games. Former student council reps have it covered when it comes to PTA participation.

And to further complicate the adults-with-kids-clique navigation, the type of activities your own kids are interested in
will also impact the adults with whom you need to associate. Kids who like soccer, music, or dance, must be brought
to said activities by their parents who bring along their own affiliations.

Fitting in will once again present a pressure for you as your own child begins to participate in the socialized world.
Some days, standing in your child's school halls, it might feel as though you've never fully graduated from the old high
school group divides. While the divisions in the world continue to exist, I suppose the one uniting factor is that we all
love our kids and do the best with what we know.